LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
Randomize
