He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
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