I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize
