Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
They asked me to help them shop for lingerie.
Tell them everything looks awful, makes their ass look fat, etc. You'll wreck their self esteem and likely both have sex with you to make themselves feel better.
You're the most understanding sister I could ever ask for.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
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