Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
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