I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
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