So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
Randomize
