Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
The air taste purple.
Randomize
