ya dads aren't the best wingmen
It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
Randomize
