Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
i am craving dick and cupcakes
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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