i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
Randomize
