Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
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