We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
Randomize
