whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
Randomize
