Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
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