also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
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