I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE A DRUNK WHEN ALL MY ENABLERS ARE BUSY?!
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Randomize