we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
