that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
Randomize
