the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
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