Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
i just wrote an ode to an enchilada dorito. i'll need that pregnancy test now please.
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
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