He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
