Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Randomize
