Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
