im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
Randomize
