She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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