I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
What drink are we having for lunch?
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
