I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Randomize
