i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
Randomize
