So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
You randomly sent me a black Santa Claus emoji at 2am. I think alcohol was involved.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize
