and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize
