Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize
