Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
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