chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
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