David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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