So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
so i was sitting on this guys lap, and we were flirting and everything right..well his phone kept ringing, turns out it was his pregnant wife...she had gone into labor..
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
My dad just said "fuck circus"
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
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