Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Randomize
