Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
THIS IS WHAT CELL PHONES ARE FOR! So you can tell me that you're bringing your coworker who lives in the "Halleleuia community" home for a beer SO I'M NOT DRESSED IN LEATHER LINGERIE WHEN HE WALKS IN THE FUCKING DOOR!!
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
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