You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
Randomize
