Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
I could fuck to npr.
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
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