Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
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