where does the pee come out of this thing
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize
