he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
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