I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
Randomize
