I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
My neighbor caught me peeing on his rose bushes at 2 in the morning while wearing my Santa hat. My sex appeal has never been higher.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
Randomize
