Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
