I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
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