Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
