he wants to bone in the snuggie
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize