On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
I think my moral compass just broke
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